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How Can We Stop Using Drugs to Cope with Our Grief?

When we use drugs and addictive behaviors to cope with our grief, many of us find that not only are we not helping ourselves heal from the pain and sadness of our loss, but we’re making that pain worse by adding on all of the self-destructiveness and pain of addiction. We find that our addictionsRead More

Why Should We Stop Guilt Tripping Ourselves?

When we make mistakes or feel we’ve let ourselves or others down, our instinct is usually to react with harshness – judgment, criticism, self-blame, self-deprecation. We berate and belittle ourselves. We put ourselves down. We call ourselves a failure. We tell ourselves we’re stupid, weak, not in control. We guilt trip ourselves, exacerbating our alreadyRead More

Why Do We Self-Blame?

Many of us have a tendency to form unhealthy attachments to our emotions, and among the feelings we commonly become unhealthily attached to are our guilt, shame and self-blame. We instinctively blame ourselves for things that aren’t our fault. We hold onto our mistakes and wrongdoings long after they’ve stopped hurting anyone else, but forRead More

What Are Emotional Addictions?

We tend to associate addiction with a dependence on a substance or behavior, drugs and alcohol, gambling, sex or eating, to name a few. Some of us become addicted not to something external but to our own emotions, feeling compulsively attached and dependent upon feeling these emotions in order to cope, to be happy, orRead More

How Does Admitting “Powerlessness” Work Against Us?

Many addiction self-help programs advocate admitting we’re powerless over our addictions, our emotions and our mental illnesses as part of our recovery. The idea is to admit we need help and support, to lean on our higher power for strength, and to stop feeling as though we’re invincible, which can actually hold us back inRead More

Why is it a Good Idea to Stop Watching the News?

One of the first things professionals recommend when treating depression and anxiety is to stop watching the news. We’re hesitant to stop watching altogether because we feel it’s our civic duty to stay informed, to know what’s going on in the world so that we can somehow make a positive impact in our own way.Read More

How Do Our Belief Systems Affect Our Mental Health?

The belief systems we carry with us into adulthood are often formed during our childhoods. We inherit them from our families. We develop them on our own from our own experiences and unique perspectives. We adopt other people’s beliefs as our own when they resonate with us. Our belief systems inform how we feel aboutRead More

Can Envy Contribute to Addiction and Mental Illness?

We know that our addictions are often the coping mechanisms we develop to deal with intense pain, but we don’t always explore in depth what those sources of pain are for us. We feel deep sadness and fear that contribute not only to our addictions but also to our depression, anxiety and other mental healthRead More

How Can Expectations Hurt Us?

Having expectations for ourselves and our recovery can be helpful. Expectations can help us to define goals for ourselves and to set intentions, to design plans and to create visions for ourselves. Our expectations can hurt us, however, especially when we become so consumed with trying to attain perfection that we don’t allow ourselves toRead More

Can We Learn to Embrace Uncertainty?

For many of us, our uncertainty around the future, our recovery, and our lives in general tends to fill us with fear, worry and trepidation. We feel unsure of ourselves and lacking in confidence and self-assuredness. We feel dread about the future and all its unknowns. We’re consumed by questions and feel angst and anxietyRead More