As we’re working to heal, something that often causes us confusion is knowing whether or not we should move on from the past, how we should let it go, and when we should be moving on from it. We don’t want to get stuck in an endless loop of our painful memories, constantly replaying them in our minds and causing ourselves worsened mental and emotional pain, but at the same time we don’t want to try to force ourselves to move on before we’re ready. We don’t want to rush ourselves to feel detachment before we genuinely feel it. Should we move on from the past, or keep exploring it in order to heal from it?
The answer to this question might lie in finding the delicate balance between the two extremes. We might never be able to fully move on from the past. It is a part of us, it is a part of our truth and part of what makes us who we are. When we’re able to examine our pasts, we stand to learn so many valuable lessons. We’re able to see the spiritual tests in our challenges. We’re able to glean the wisdom and the beauty from even our most painful experiences. On the other hand, when we’re relentless about throwing our pasts in our own faces, judging ourselves because of them, constantly reminding ourselves of our traumatic experiences, we’re not allowing ourselves to have a healthy relationship with our pasts. We’re not opening ourselves up to learning from them or letting ourselves be guided by them to make better choices and implement healthier patterns moving forward. We’re simply using our pasts to cause ourselves unrelenting, constant pain, and this impedes our healing instead of helping us to find peace.
We want to get to a place where we can explore our pasts but not be consumed by them. We want to learn from our pasts but not obsess about them. When we’re able to view our pasts and the difficulties we’ve experienced in a positive light, that’s when we’ve truly moved on from our pain. Otherwise, we still have considerable healing work to do. If we’re allowing our past to haunt our present and corrupt our chances for a happy future, we haven’t healed. We want to be able to use our past to inform and guide our healing journey as we move forward, and the best way to do that is to examine our pasts with self-love and nurturing rather than judgment and self-condemnation.
The community of Riverside Recovery has personal experience with addiction and the feelings of hopelessness and disconnection that come with it. We’re here to help you reclaim the life you love. Call (800) 871-5440 today.