The following was written by Sarah, a Riverside Recovery alumna, and has been lightly edited for web format.
I am grateful to be alive and write briefly about my experience on this journey of recovery. I was born in 1962 to loving parents, the first grandchild on both sides of the family. I was raised in a middle-class home in Fort Lauderdale with my parents, my mother’s youngest sister, and, at times, both maternal and paternal grandmothers. With the extended family present in the home, my maternal grandmother and my aunt had severe, persistent mental illnesses. We were not the “perfect family,” but I knew I was loved.
I started using alcohol and street drugs at the age of 14, skipping school and sneaking out of the house at night. By the age of 15, my use had escalated to the point that I dropped out of high school and by 16 started to use intravenous drugs. I put myself in dangerous situations with men who took advantage of an impaired youth and experienced sexual trauma, shame, and guilt. These behaviors did not change as I aged. My whole life, up to that time, was dictated by my use and abuse of alcohol and drugs, whether I had an education, where I worked, and who I loved. All of the morals and values that I was raised with were dismissed in the service of the next fix. My family felt powerless to help me. I worked in construction, restaurants, and bars, where I could drink and drug and support myself. Not the track for college that my family had planned for me!
Moving to Tampa with $100 and a Garbage Bag
In 1986, I moved to Tampa, in with my parents who had moved here before me, with $100 and a garbage bag of clothes. I found work in the bars, lived in lousy apartments, and, of course, found all of the same street drugs in Tampa that I abused in South Florida. It wasn’t until the age of 35, in 1997, when I got into legal trouble, that I learned there was another way to live. My parents paid for me to go into a residential treatment center where I lived for an entire year. I was really messed up from years of alcoholic drinking and abusing every hard drug that was on the streets. During that year, I did stay out of trouble and was able to complete the pre-trial intervention program that the courts generously granted me.
May 14, 2001: The First Sober Date That Mattered
I also learned about the culture of Alcoholics Anonymous. Sadly, my story includes two more stints in treatment, a couple of arrests, and jail time until I received the gift of desperation and grace for the first time on May 14, 2001. That was my first sober date that mattered. With a lot of willingness, good sponsorship, and continued grace, I stayed sober for many years. During that time, relationships with my family were repaired. I started college at 3 years of sobriety and graduated with an MSW from USF in 2011. By 2013, I had a job with the federal government and LCSW behind my name and was living in Cocoa Beach. I had arrived!!!
When the Letters Behind My Name Couldn’t Save Me
I did continue to go to meetings, but over the next few years, I stopped being a sponsor, stopped doing service work, and slowly but surely quit praying and going to meetings. In 2017, my back hurt! My physician agreed that my back hurt and prescribed a narcotic to ease the pain. I also had emotional pain. My father passed that year, and another doctor agreed that a little something for anxiety would help with the grief. I determined that I could now drink like a lady because I had those letters behind my name, a home that was practically on the beach, and an important job. A little wine wouldn’t hurt, and if it was a problem, I could just go back to AA.
It was a problem!!! It became a big problem at work, and I was released with early medical retirement. My liver was so impaired that I was hallucinating. In 2022, my mother asked me to move in with her, as it was too much to care for her home independently. I quickly found a doctor to add morphine to the oxycodone I was already taking. I had kept in touch with my friends in AA that I got sober with, and thank God for them. They encouraged me to go back to treatment and found Riverside Recovery. In September 2023, I entered into detox for what I hope is the last time.
Life After Riverside Recovery
My sober date is September 23, 2024. I have a sponsor who has a sponsor. I sponsor 4 women and do not say no when asked to help in AA. I have a home group, Old School Group, at 7 am Monday through Friday. Come see us! I attend the group conscience meeting, and I am the group’s GSR. I stay busy in AA. It is great fun. Also, staying connected with the Riverside Alumni group has increased my sober network. I am always going to hang with alcoholics and addicts; I prefer to stick with the clean and sober ones!
In 2025, I had the opportunity to cruise from Rome to Barcelona with a friend. We also went to the Grand Canyon, Bryce, and Zion National Parks. I have taken my mother and aunt to Mobile to see their siblings, and we are planning another visit in March 2026. Upcoming planned travels include Costa Rica in May 2026 and Alaska in July 2026. If I were not sober, I wouldn’t be able to go on these trips. Sobriety has also made it so I am present for my mother, who is declining and needs assistance with medication management, driving, and staying in her home. Most importantly, I live by the values my dear mother and father instilled in me before I ever took a drink or a drug, and for that I am truly grateful.
Your Recovery Story Can Start Today
Sarah’s story is proof that it’s never too late to come back to recovery, no matter how much time has passed or how far you’ve fallen. Whether this is your first time seeking help or you’re returning after a relapse, Riverside Recovery is here to walk with you every step of the way.
Contact Riverside Recovery today to learn how our programs can help you rebuild your life and rediscover the values that have always been inside you.