Those of us living with addiction know firsthand just how destructive it can be. Grappling with addiction can cause us to feel as though we’ve become different people, living entirely different lives, with dysfunctional ways of thinking and feeling, and tumultuous, conflicted relationships. We don’t feel like ourselves. We feel like strangers to ourselves. We don’t recognize ourselves when we look in the mirror. We feel like the lives we’re currently living are the tattered remains of our former lives. We feel a deep sense of dissatisfaction and unhappiness. We feel unfulfilled. We feel ashamed of ourselves. We feel disappointed in who we’ve become and the mistakes we’ve made. We live with remorse for our wrongs and deep regret for hurting people. When we’re in this place, we can easily become depressed. We struggle to hold onto our hope for healing and change. We worry that we’ll never be able to be the person we want to be.
Working towards recovery brings us a chance for redemption. When we start focusing on healing ourselves, we can develop a sense of inner peace that we may never have experienced before. Our recovery program can include taking inventory of ourselves, our thoughts and feelings, our past mistakes and wrongdoings. This self-inventory can help us to process where we are in our lives, what things we want to work on, and what we need to change within ourselves and in our lives in order for us to be happy and healthy. The more we work our program, the more we can implement these changes. When we start seeing tangible results, such as increased feelings of well-being, less anxiety and more inner calm, we know our transformation is underway, and this makes us feel a sense of transformation and redemption that is powerfully liberating. We feel encouraged to keep monitoring ourselves, to keep up with our regular self-inventory, so that we can continue to keep ourselves on track. We feel empowered to never again let ourselves get to that dark place where we felt so lost and sad.
In many recovery programs, it is encouraged that, along with our self-inventory, we work to make amends to the people we’ve hurt throughout the course of our addiction. When we are able to recognize our wrongs, apologize and seek forgiveness, we feel redeemed after years of holding onto the bitterness of regret and our painful feelings of shame. We can feel that we’ve achieved redemption even though we can’t undo the past. We can move forward, learn from our past mistakes and design lives for ourselves that we are proud of.
The community at Riverside Recovery has personal experience with addiction and recovery. We’re here to help you find your way. Call (800) 871-5440.